How do I write a eulogy?

Writing a eulogy can be both an emotional and daunting task, especially when you're grieving. However, a well-prepared eulogy allows you to celebrate the life of a loved one and provide comfort to those mourning. To help guide you through the process, here’s a step-by-step breakdown on how to write a eulogy, along with helpful tips and eulogy examples to inspire you. Whether you're wondering how to start a eulogy or what details to include, this guide offers key insights to help you create a heartfelt tribute.

1. Plan and Prepare

Before you begin writing, take the time to organize your thoughts and memories about your loved one. Reflect on the person’s life, achievements, and their impact on others. Researching how to start a eulogy will provide you with various approaches, whether you choose to open with a quote, a personal story, or a reflection on their legacy. Jot down key points, including stories, anecdotes, and personal experiences that encapsulate their personality. Consider reaching out to family and friends for additional memories to help paint a more comprehensive picture of the person you’re honoring.

2. Keep it Concise

While there’s often a lot you may want to share, it's crucial to keep the eulogy concise. Ideally, it should last around 5-10 minutes. Be respectful of time while delivering a funeral speech that touches on the most important aspects of their life. Begin with a brief welcome and introduction that explains your relationship and why you were chosen to deliver the eulogy. This will help create a personal connection with the audience and set the tone for the rest of the speech.

3. Share Personal Memories

One of the most touching aspects of any eulogy is the sharing of personal memories. Think about times when your loved one showed their kindness, humor, or strength, and share those stories with the audience. These heartfelt anecdotes not only honor the person's life but also provide comfort to those in attendance. Personal stories are often more impactful than general observations, as they highlight the uniqueness of the individual and offer glimpses into their true character.

“The life of our loved ones is placed in the memory of the living.” – Marcus Tullius Cicero

4. Be Mindful of the Audience

When preparing the eulogy, consider the emotional state of the audience. While some light-hearted moments can provide relief during a somber time, be sensitive to the fact that many will be deeply grieving. Striking the right balance between celebrating the person's life and recognizing the grief of the moment is key. Avoid any humor or commentary that could come across as inappropriate or insensitive.

5. Focus on Positivity and Inspiration

A eulogy is an opportunity to celebrate the life of the deceased by focusing on their accomplishments, contributions, and the love they shared with others. Use uplifting and inspiring language to honor their memory. While it’s important to acknowledge the sadness of their passing, try to frame their life in a way that emphasizes the positive impact they had on those around them. An inspiring eulogy helps mourners reflect on the person’s legacy and the ways in which they touched others.

6. Acknowledge Grief and Loss

Though it’s essential to celebrate the life of the deceased, it’s equally important to acknowledge the grief and loss being experienced. Recognizing the pain can help validate the emotions of those in mourning. Offering a few empathetic words about the difficult nature of loss can provide comfort and support to the audience. You might share a brief reflection on how the loss has affected you and those close to the deceased, creating a sense of solidarity in the shared experience of grief.

7. Consider Cultural and Religious Beliefs

If your loved one had specific cultural or religious beliefs, it’s important to respect and honor those in the eulogy. This might involve incorporating religious scripture, traditional customs, or cultural references that were important to them. When unsure, it’s a good idea to consult with the family to ensure that the eulogy aligns with their expectations and traditions.

8. Practice Your Delivery

Before delivering the eulogy, practice several times to ensure you’re comfortable with the flow and content. Reading it out loud will help you work through any emotional moments and gauge the timing. Practicing also allows you to make adjustments if something doesn’t feel quite right. During such a highly emotional event, it’s common to feel overwhelmed, so being well-prepared will help you deliver the speech more smoothly.

9. Allow Yourself to Be Emotional

Delivering a eulogy can be incredibly emotional, and it’s perfectly okay to show your feelings. Letting yourself tear up or pause to compose yourself makes the speech more authentic and relatable. If you're worried about becoming too emotional to continue, consider asking a trusted friend or family member to step in as a backup. Often, just knowing you have a plan b can bring peace of mind, and you may not even need to use it.

10. End with a Meaningful Conclusion

As you approach the end of the eulogy, focus on leaving the audience with a thoughtful, uplifting message. Thank everyone for coming together to honor the memory of the deceased and encourage them to carry forward their fond memories of the person. A hopeful conclusion can offer a sense of closure, and expressing gratitude for the shared support may help ease the collective grief.

Writing a eulogy is no easy task, but following these guidelines can help you craft a speech that honors your loved one with grace and respect. If you need further inspiration, consider clicking the eulogy examples below and read a sample eulogy and how others have approached this delicate responsibility. While there really isn’t a eulogy template or one size fits all, reading an example of a eulogy can inspire you to begin.

Example Eulogy for a Mother

Eulogy for a Dad

Eulogy for a Spouse

Example Eulogy for a Father

Ultimately, what matters most is that your words come from the heart and reflect the unique life of the person you're remembering.


Remember, a eulogy is a heartfelt tribute to the departed, so speak from the heart and share your love and respect for the person in a sincere manner. Your words can provide comfort and solace during a difficult time.


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The song has ended but the melody lingers on.
— Irving Berlin