Eulogy Examples

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Eulogy for Mother

If you knew our mom, then you probably know what an avid reader she was. Mom loved her books. Knowing this, my brothers and sisters and I thought it would be fitting to share with you, The Book of Norma.

From Norma Smith To Mrs John Carter To Just Norma……

Chapter 1: Norma Smith

Our mom was born the youngest of three, here in Spokane. Her parents were kind and loving, just like she was. Her dad worked hard to make ends meet, sometimes working 3 or 4 jobs at times. His passion was his flower garden and our mom loved to watch him care for it as a little girl.

At just 10 years old she came down with scarlet fever and missed a great deal of school. This had a cumulative effect on her education, keeping her constantly working hard to keep up with her grade level. Her hard work and determination paid off and she was able to graduate from high school on time and with her classmates.

After high school she was hired at General Electric where she met our dad, John.

Chapter 2: Enter John Carter

Mom and dad met and fell in love while working together at GE, her as a secretary and him as a salesman. While mom was all in, her parents weren’t as convinced this was a good fit. (pause laughter)

You see, mom was 20 and dad was 30. And on top of that, mom was Methodist and dad was Catholic. To say this proved to be initially problematic, would be an understatement. In fact, after my dad proposed, my mom’s parents just happened to plan an impromptu road trip with her to California.

Why you ask?

Well to give her an opportunity to see if she might like to rekindle an old flame with a past boyfriend before committing to marrying our dad!

Epic fail, by the way. (pause laughter)

They arrived only to find the past flame engaged and mom’s intentions unchanged regardless.

Mom and dad married in 1955 and remained happily married for 56 years.

My brother Greg likes to say that our dad’s first sales experience was in winning our mom’s heart.

Chapter 3: Mom

This is perhaps my favorite part of this book. By 1956 the newlyweds started their family. Mom left her job to be home with us and raise us.

Let me elaborate; by us I mean……

Brian, Barb, Steve, Greg, Ann, me, Patty and John.

Whew, I’m tired just saying all those names!

Not mom, though. She made loving us and caring for us look effortless. (Pause)

We were so lucky to have a mom that made this all look so easy. She let us be kids but she also provided discipline when it was needed. She would somehow manage to have full 4 course dinners on the table every night and have fun with us while doing it! Although I have to admit, secretly my favorite dinners were the ones when our dad was traveling and the menu changed a bit…. to pizza and tater tots, and if we were really lucky, McDonalds!

My brother John remembers with awe what a great manager she was to pull this all off. She managed all 8 of us kids, herself, the bills and my dad too!

A favorite family story was the time our dad came home and told mom that he gave away our only TV to the priest at church. It’s said to have gone something like this…

“You did what? I’m raising 8 kids and managing all our bills and food and you gave away our only entertainment????”

To which dad replied, “It’s okay I’ll just win us another.” (pause laughter)

It was true, being a salesman for GE, and a really good one at that, dad always managed to win our family really nice appliances.

As you can probably imagine with 8 kids, there are so many stories I could share. One of my sister Patty’s favorite memories was going to the drive-in with mom to watch The Sound of Music.

My sister Barb recalls cooking and baking with mom.

One of my brother Steve’s favorites was the time he climbed into a storm drain at 4 years old. Yes you heard that correctly; Steve, 4 years old, and in a storm drain! The only thing that kept him alive was that his head didn’t fit, so thankfully he could be rescued. We remember well, mom calling the city and demanding that a grate be put over all the storm drains in our neighborhood!

There are memories of trips my parents would take to all sorts of beautiful places through my dad’s work. One in particular resulted in a German woman babysitting all of us. We were not fans. Let’s just say we made sure she never returned! (pause laughter)

One mom moment I will always hold close to my heart was when I was 14 or 15. I didn’t drive yet but I wanted so badly to go to a game 90 minutes away. I have no idea how she found the time but she somehow broke away and drove me to that game. I stood with my friends having fun while she sat quietly in the stands, patiently waiting for me.

Mom had this way about her that was so comforting without ever having to physically even touch you. It was this combination of her kindness and her calmness. It was the softness of her voice. She could always make you feel safe.

Well, with the only exception possibly being on the rare occasion that you had done something so bad, you happened to be being chased by her with the wooden spoon! (pause laughter)

It was on those days that a visit to Jean Lamb was in order. Jean was our next door neighbor and our mom’s good friend. She was from Arkansas and she had a thick southern accent. Sometimes if we peeked out the window we could see them sitting out back with their wine or their coffee and we could hear their laughter. My brother Steve often recalls how mom would come back from Jean’s house with a southern accent for the rest of the evening!

As fate would have it, mom and Jean would cross paths again much later in life sharing a home together at an assisted living facility until mom’s death. More on this to come.

I also remember mom and dad met monthly with 4 other couples in a pinochle card group. As kids we looked forward to the month it was held at our house as much as our parents. There was so much laughter and fun on those nights. It was out of this group that mom developed a special friendship with Bernice Baker. The two quickly became more like family than friends. Mom would travel to Hawaii to visit Bernice and vice versa. It was a very treasured relationship.

So mom stayed home with us until we were all in school, and it was then that she ventured back out into the world of work. When I was 15 she started working at the Old National Bank processing checks. She took great pride in her responsibilities there. She also exercised a great deal of patience with my constant calls to her asking questions on how to prepare dinner!

Later, she and her sister in law, Gerrie started a house cleaning business. The two did that for many years until retiring. I remember how much mom loved all her sisters in law. She loved getting together with the whole Schlosser family and so did we as cousins.

Chapter 4: The Golden Years of Sequim and Crab Acres

Our parents loved Sequim and often traveled there with their motor home until eventually moving there after retirement in 1992. It was so heartwarming to see them during this time period. It was perhaps the best time of their life together. Our dad became a different person from being retired and living there.

It was also the time Norma started to emerge. From daughter to wife to mother to Norma. During this time our mom really became her own person. She was president of a woman’s investment group she and some other women started. She was responsible for making the group’s investments. She developed a network of friends. She and our dad were a part of a local hiking group there. They walked together or hiked together every single day. Life was good.

All of us kids and our families; including 25 grandchildren and 17 great grandchildren, remember so fondly the times we spent visiting them on what we named, “Crab Acres”. It was there all the kids would go clamming and crabbing with Grandpa, getting their hands dirty in every step of the process. We’d bring our catch home to mom and she would happily cook up everything we caught.

It was in 2007 that our dad’s dementia required that they move back to Spokane. Mom cared for him as long as she could. I remember she kept a notebook of what they would do each day, so when he would ask her, something he did more and more as the disease progressed, she would lovingly remind him to look in his notebook.

One of the most bittersweet memories comes to mind in her care of dad. She would start their evening routine by putting dad’s eyedrops in his eyes and his lotion on his head. He would often look at her and say, “You know you're really nice for taking care of me but I really want my wife back.”

Chapter 5: Kim’s Cottage

After our dad died in 2011, mom slowly required more assistance as time went on. She lived at different times with my sister Barb and with me until she made the choice to move into an assisted living facility. She chose Kim’s Cottage, which happened to be run by my good friend Kim. She was quite proud to be the first resident ever to move in with her own car! I mean it was after all, the perfect way to get to Curves. Curves; being the gym she joined in her 80’s!

Bittersweet as it also was, mom was reunited at Kim’s Cottage with her good friend Jean Lamb, her past partner in wine and her past support while in the nitty gritty of motherhood and 8 children.

Together they continued to take care of each other over the occasional glass of wine and lots of laughter. It was such a comfort to both our family and the Lamberson family that they could be together. The staff at the facility share many stories of the fun they would have. Mom’s sense of humor really bloomed. In fact, she has been credited with some very funny one-liners that I probably shouldn’t repeat right now! (pause laughter)

Epilogue: Norma

Perhaps the best evidence of a life well lived lies in the richness of our stories; the manner and the grace with which we greet each new chapter of life, each new hat we put on and then take off and then put on again.

Our mom wore all her hats so well and with such grace. Whether titled Norma Smith or Mrs. John Carter or in the role of daughter, or wife, or caregiver, or mother, or grandmother, or friend… one thing remained and that was the heart of Norma.

Norma, who never sweat the small stuff.

Who is remembered by all who knew her for her kindness and her warmth.

Who showed her love in her countless acts of service.

Who set an example for all of us on how to be a caring and loving person, regardless of the role we happen to be in.

Thank you, mom. Thank you for making loving us and taking care of us look so easy. I know I speak for all of us when I say that we are so grateful to have had you as our mom.

We love you and we miss you.